When in doubt, pass the blame
Writing is difficult. Meaningful writing, exquisitely so. I’ve spent more time staring at blank pages than looking into people’s eyes while talking. As a matter of fact, I look away while talking (even during zoom calls) because it’s way too intimate for me. I just can’t bring myself to peer into others’ souls. As a mere consequence, I’ve got nothing but respect for those who can write immediately as if they were born to spill on paper, as well as for those who maintain eye contact while conversing. When you’ve figured out what you are going to write, half of the job is done. Conversely, when you peer intently, you don’t have to listen to that person: staring into their eyes makes them believe that you are in tune with their words. If only blank pages could be fooled with this strategy.
Technically speaking, Mariana Trench is the lowest point on earth. But it’s not entirely accurate. The lowest point on this planet is a human feeling sorry for themselves. Maudlin is the lowest of all lows. Once a person gets trapped in this hole of a victimhood, then there is no escape. Instead of pulling oneself out of misery, often self-imposed, self-pity compels you to look for scapegoats. In the end, you remain at your worst while doing pretty much zilch to reverse the situation. Although easier said than done, an effective first step could be by accepting that you are indeed indulging in self-pity.
Some years ago, while watching Ondu Motteya Kathe (2017) on a streaming platform, I told my wife that the main character reminds me of Akshay Khanna. She thought I was referring to the baldness common to both the gentlemen but I wasn’t suggesting that. My point was Mr. Khanna could have easily played this part—barring the lingual constraints—based on his talent and experience. Of course, his lack of lushful crown would add to the onscreen allure but that’s not the crux of this paragraph. If anything, Mr. Khanna’s career trajectory reminds you how a natural phenomenon deprived Bollywood of a really good actor because they just can’t imagine a star with underdevelopment on the top of his head. What we conveniently forget is that Sean Connery wore a toupee in every single Bond film. Perhaps, more than his industry, it’s perhaps the failure of the writers in Hindi cinema who can’t script something to match the calibre of Mr. Khanna. Maybe they should watch that Kannada film too.
Elon Musk is unbelievably rich but when you read his story, it is evident that he is least interested in wealth. This once-bullied South African kid seems intent on disrupting the course of human evolution and is devoted to playing a major role in the future. In simpler words, he is building the present that would dictate the future. Compared to his ambitions, Steve Jobs’s plans sound capitalistically petty. While Jobs appeared like solving problems, Musk is on a different tangent altogether: let’s build a car that neither cares about the quality of the road nor accept the probability of an accident. This approach solves the problem of having a problem in the first place. When he is not busy hyping bitcoin on Twitter, he is engrossed in designing the world of the 22nd century. In the history of automobiles, only two companies have never gone bankrupt and Tesla is one of them (no dogecoin for guessing the other car giant). Let’s see what happens next.
If you are a student of comedy, here’s what you must do: excavate yourself. Find who you truly are because you can only cover a short distance pretending to be what you aren’t. The greatest comedians have come to know themselves better than anybody else in their lives. That doesn’t mean that they are narcissistic lumps craving for chuckles. No. On the contrary, they are comfortable with who they and what they are capable of thinking. That’s a spot all artists hope they reach someday. The more I read about comedians (and their art form), it becomes obvious that they are cracking jokes because they love laughing themselves. The void on the outside complements the void on the inside. Lovely, isn’t it? And maybe that’s why it’s eerie to come across the so-called comedians who refuse to laugh at others’ jokes no matter how great they land.
In 2004, Bill Gates promised that two years later, the problem of spam will be solved. Somehow. This quote is on record. He was quite sure that the vanguards of technology must make sure that they destroy the backbone of spammers. Long time, no see? Well, it’s 2021 and we continue to receive spam in our folders. Maybe this is the reason why Gates decided to turn his attention to solvable problems of the world. Like AIDS, malaria, clean water, hygiene, etc.
What is there to life if not a moment to abandon yourself and surrender to nature? A glance at the sky or the painfully slow clouds or listening to the birds chirp—they are complaining about climate change, not singing—or just sit down and enjoy the occasional breeze. Anything that allows you the luxury of being offline. Otherwise, we are so online that it’s difficult to measure our existence without wifi/data. I am not proud of my dependency on the internet either but for the time being, I feel that it is a necessity. Staying indoors in a city where I haven’t made new friends can be draining. However, going back to nature, I pray we all realize that there is nothing more gorgeous than a sunset and there is nothing more hopeful than a sunrise.
Beethoven, for all his genius, managed to write only one opera. Interestingly, Isaac Newton attended only one opera (no, it wasn’t Beethoven’s Fidelio) in his life and didn’t even complete it. He was so bored of the vocal theatrics on stage that he left the room with apparent disdain on his face. But to give him credit, he at least tried something he wasn’t accustomed to. A lot of us, despite easy accessibility, don’t even do that. For instance, how many of us have heard/watched a jazz performance on youtube? This despite loving the heck out of Soul (2020)?
Don’t give up, is, in all fairness, the worst piece of advice you’ll ever get. If anything, you must learn to give up when it’s time. Whether you are dealing with your work or a person, figure out when there is a signal for you to move the fuck on. Giving up isn’t always a sign of defeat. Sometimes, it’s an assurance of continuity. It’s like saying “I am going now but if I don’t go now, I will never get back to anything” with utmost sincerity. Also, if you are going, remember that you are not just giving up on others: you are giving up on yourself too. And that’s not a bad thing.
The past weekend was my first in Mangalore when I couldn’t host a quiz. In my time away from posing questions to my beloved fellow quizzers over a zoom call, I finally acknowledged that the purpose of quiz is not rooted in knowledge but in camaraderie. Nobody cares who knows what and who doesn’t, who won or who couldn’t open a score, the only thing that matters is people are having fun together. Acknowledging each other’s presence for about an hour. Yes, once in a while, a question (read: answer) will blow your mind but that is an accident. More often than not, quizzing is about lame jokes and the accompanying laughter. I missed them dearly; can’t wait to host my next quiz.
The curse of our generation is we are not going to die anytime soon. The same old curse that carries on till the end of time. Thanks to which, everybody thinks that they would have done better had they taken birth earlier. You’d often hear this: people in their 20s in the second decade of the 21st century telling you that they wished they were around when Woodstock was going on. Some even extend their imagination further down the line to the mid-1950s. Shameless victims of black-and-white photography, you can concede. To my disappointment, I am yet to hear a desi tell me that he wished he was part of the Dandi March or Quit India Movement or something. Nope, never. But here’s the thing: this desire to wander inside the forest of nostalgia is emblematic of whoever with four ounce of independent thoughts. Even the writers in the early 1900s were lamenting that they were born too late and they wished they were around when there was no typewriter or telegram or radio to distract. Seriously, bro?
I’ve often reiterated that there is a MASSIVE difference between an education system and a literacy system. Countries like India, with a serious population problem, focus on LS because ES is best left to those parents who have more than enough money in their bank accounts. Yet, what we fail to notice in this money-driven conundrum is how those who benefited from ES are often the first ones to apprehend the LS. Instead of being grateful that they did pretty well—given the overcrowded nature of this country—they take refuge in passing the blame. Somehow, they was absolutely nothing wrong with them. They were the metaphorical Arjunas in search of the figurative Dronacharyas. They were embodiments of perfection while the system was rotten to the core. What we witness during such shift-the-blame procedure is we tend to aim for the nonexistent fruit. A more advisable method would be to understand how they came out pretty good despite the system.
All good ideas have one thing in common. They can be better. Ideas, by design, are meant to fulfill themselves. That’s also what separates them from random thoughts. A thought doesn’t have to grow. It is like a wave that touched your feet and went back to mother ocean. An idea hopes to be a tsunami: there is no going back. So, if you have a good idea, try to make it great. Don’t be complacent.
Did you the know the word vaccination has its root in the Latin word for cow (vacca) and it’s very intriguing to learn about the apprehensions people had about getting vaccinated? It was a David vs Goliath going on between people of science and people of faith. The sad part was that the former wanted to save the latter, not the other way around. A rather strange bout of altruism. Some of the craziest theories used to float amongst the church-going folks who were the earliest anti-vaxxers. Some of the earliest opponents of Edward Jenner’s smallpox vaccine actually started spreading rumours that getting vaccinated might turn people into cows. Yes, levels of paranoia.